How can I see what processes are running?

I use Ubuntu Server 10.10 and I would like to see what processes are running. I know that PostgreSQL is running on my machine but I can not see it with the top or ps commands, so I assume that they aren’t showing all of the running processes. Is there another command which will show all running processes or is there any other parameters I can use with top or ps for this?

What can I use to monitor and log incoming/outgoing traffic to/from remote hosts?

I run a web server (Debian Squeeze on a VPS), and the graphs provided by the hosting company show consistently that around twice as much traffic is incoming to the server compared to the outgoing traffic. I am a little confused by this, so I would like to run some kind of logging utility on the machine that will not only confirm the upload/download figures, but also split them up by the remote host involved, so I can see if a large proportion of the incoming traffic is from one particular source.